The quality of our life totally depends on how we feel.

If we feel loved, happy, peaceful, abundant, grateful and content most of the time, our life is GREAT!

If we feel scared, depressed, angry, lacking, judgmental and not satisfied most of the time, our life is terrible.

Rich people might feel great or terrible. Money is not the secret.

Powerful people might feel great or terrible. Power is not the secret.

Attractive people might feel great or terrible. Good looks are not the secret.

Dreamers might feel great or terrible. Following your dream isn’t the secret.

Family people might feel great or terrible. Family isn’t the secret.

Intelligence, physical prowess and social popularity or positions are not the secret to feeling great either.

In fact, nothing on the outside can make us feel loved, happy, peaceful, abundant, grateful and content most of the time.

Good feelings about ourselves, other people and the world around us come from what is going on inside us.

Let’s go back a step…

Feelings work like this; first we experience something (or we recall something that has already happened), then we think something (either consciously or subconsciously), and then we feel something.

Event – Thought – Feeling

Our experience or the event is on the outside of us. Our recollections, thoughts and feelings about that experience are all on the inside.

It is not what we have, don’t have, what happens or doesn’t happen that determines our feelings – it is our THOUGHTS.

This morning I took a Pit Stop because I wasn’t feeling my usual loved, happy, peaceful, abundant, grateful and content self.

I knew I had to take a Pit Stop because I could hear my Shady going on and on and on about several things. The first was worrying about workshop bookings, the second was worrying about money, the third was worrying about my ‘to do’ list and the fourth was worrying about an upcoming family holiday.

I feel great now and not a single thing has changed on the outside – no more bookings, no sudden influx of money, nothing serious ticked off my ‘to do’ list, and nothing sorted for our holiday.

So how can I possibly feel great?

I feel great because I changed what was going on in the INSIDE.

If you feel scared, depressed, angry, lacking, judgmental or not satisfied, try this:

  1. Take some time out (give yourself an hour) to listen to all your worries, concerns and problems (Listen to Shady). You can write them all down if you like. Keep going until you have said or written them all.
  2. Talk to someone else about these worries, concerns and problems but make sure they just listen (you don’t want them to fire you up or start blaming others or try to solve it for you).
  3. Express your feelings to get them out of you physically (feelings are energy that if repressed actually stay inside your body).
  4. Let your worries go in an imaginary way to symbolise that you have listened to them, considered them and no longer need them.
  5. Ask your inner wisdom (Sparky) what to believe, say and do now.
  6. Change your belief and go and say or do whatever Sparky told you to!

This process is called a Pit Stop and it totally works to get you back in charge of your thoughts and feelings. (Or of what is happening on the inside.)

You cannot ignore, overpower or deny Shady’s ongoing thoughts about what is happening on the outside, (nor the bad feelings that come as a result of these thoughts) for very long. Willpower doesn’t work (nor does drinking, smoking, gambling, eating junk food, or whatever else we do to avoid it or repress it.)

The best way to stop yourself feeling bad is to acknowledge and listen to your Shady (fearful thoughts) and to feel the feelings that came as a result of those thoughts. Once you have done this they are way easier to manage! When or if they come back just say, “Sorry Shady you had your turn, I don’t believe, think and feel that way anymore!”

Next time you feel bad, give a Pit Stop a whirl and let me know if it leaves you feeling great!

Love Kathy

Ps Summer workshops start next Thursday 18th and Friday 19th January for 6-9 yr olds and an accompanying parent and Monday 22nd and Tuesday 23rd for 9-12 yr olds. Come along and we’ll teach your beautiful child how to do this too!

“Sparky and Shady is a relaxed and fun way to plant new seeds within a child’s mind. It encourages, gives confidence and gives children strategies to manouver and make changes in their journey through life.” Carol Cowling, mum of Joss 11.

Thanks Carol! For more testimonials see