Each of our beautiful kids is here to make a difference on the planet that only they can make. This difference is good for them, good for others and good for the earth (or, if not good for others and the earth then at least not harmful).
I believe every single human being has a unique role to play in life on earth that only they can play. I tell kids it is like a big jigsaw puzzle, every single person on the planet is a piece of the puzzle and when each person makes the difference on earth they were born to make, they put their irreplaceable piece in the puzzle. The more pieces in the puzzle the more amazing the world becomes. I also tell kids they make a difference on earth every day when they be themselves, have fun, share their love, share their gifts, learn new things and follow their dreams! The jigsaw piece analogy applies to both the daily difference they make as well as the bigger life purpose difference they will make!
No person’s difference on earth is more important than anyone else’s despite the fact that some people have ‘big’ or ‘famous’ roles to play and others don’t. The reality is that everyone is simply a piece in the puzzle, we are all important and irreplaceable and every one of us counts.
I also teach kids that one of the pieces already placed in the puzzle belonged to a man called Mahatma Gandhi whose words of wisdom include the saying, “Take care of your beliefs because they become your thoughts, take care of your thoughts because they become your words, take care of your words because they become your actions, take care of your actions because they become your habits, take care of your habits because they become your character, take care of your character because it becomes your destiny.”
In other words, “Take care of your beliefs because they become your destiny!” or “What you believe comes true for you.”
Where do kids get their beliefs?
From the age of 0 – 7 children get their beliefs directly from the people they share their life with. This is because at this age, children’s brains are in theta and delta wavelengths which basically means that everything they hear, see, feel, know and experience goes straight into their subconscious to build their base beliefs about themselves, other people and the world.
For instance, children may learn to believe, “I am loved. I am safe. I belong. I am important (but not more important that anyone else). I am worthy. I am smart. I learn from my mistakes. People are trustworthy. People will help me. People are kind. The world is a wonderful place. Life is amazing. Nature is beautiful. It is important to respect other people and nature.” Or they may learn to believe the opposite or something in between!
The point is, if you believe something about your child, other people and life then chances are very high that your child will believe it too no matter how old they are! (Unless they have changed their beliefs.)
Here’s are a few examples…
A. This morning when I was walking the dog next to a local resort I saw what I assumed were two grandparents, two parents and two kids walking towards me. The grandparents were a little ahead and I sensed there was something wrong so I asked, “Are the kids okay with dogs?” The grandmother said, “No they are not.” I put the dog on the lead as the Grandmother conveyed my question to the mum who said, “No, they are really scared of dogs.” The two kids (about 4 and 6) heard this and looked terrified as they were chaperoned past the dog by four protective grown-ups.
B. A mother recently told me that her 9-year-old daughter was “extremely anxious and that some days she stays in bed all day because she can’t face the world.”
C. A father in a workshop once told me that when his 8-year-old son got upset, he stayed upset for hours afterwards, no matter what the family said or did to help him.
I understand that in all these examples the parents are conveying the current truth about their child’s behaviour, but what might happen to these children’s behaviours and destiny if the parents changed their beliefs to…
A. My children love dogs.
B. My daughter loves and embraces life.
C. My son recovers from upsets in a reasonable time.
Kids KNOW what we believe about them and they can’t help but believe it too. That’s why it comes true for them, it is their destiny!
We can help create loving, happy and fulfilling destinies for our kids by believing empowering things about them.
What would you like your child to believe about themselves, other people and life?
I have two beautiful sons and I would like them both to believe a whole heap of great stuff, including…
“I am here to make a difference on earth that only I can make. I am here to follow my dreams (whatever they happen to be at the time). My dreams lead me to my unique life purpose. Life is a wonderful adventure. I love life. I have everything I need within me and around me to make my difference. I am loved no matter what. I have people around me to help and support me when and if I need it. I am confident. I learn from my mistakes and painful experiences. I am worthy of the best that life and love have to offer. I make a difference every day. I am grateful for my life. I am grateful for the lessons I have learnt and continue to learn. I am wise. I am exactly right for my purpose. I can do anything my Sparky tells me I can do. Most people in the world are kind, caring and honest. I intuitively know who I can trust and who I can’t trust. I am a great friend. I am loyal. I am motivated. I am respectful of myself, other people and the planet. I learn quickly and retain what I learn. I am smart. I am considerate and thoughtful of others. I stand up for myself and others in respectful ways. I am strong. I can achieve anything Sparky tells me I can. I am kind, caring and loving. I am patient. I am adventurous and fun… (and the list goes on and on)!”
Ashley and Jack are slightly older than 7 (25 and 14) but I think they both subconsciously know what I believe about them and that it somehow still affects what they believe about themselves. (Parents beliefs about their kids are incredibly powerful!)
If you would like your kids to have empowering beliefs about themselves, other people and life then all you have to do is have those beliefs about your kids yourself. Try writing down one or two beliefs you would like them to have and say them over and over in your head when you think of them or at set times during the day. For instance, you could write, “My daughter loves and embraces life”, or “My son recovers from upsets in a reasonable time” on a piece of paper and stick it next to the mirror in the bathroom and read it when you brush your teeth twice a day.
Give it a go for 30 – 90 days and let me know if your child’s behaviour changes!